Good communication is beneficial in various aspects of life. When you think about getting along in life, it seems to be the people who have excellent communication skills that tend to rise to the top. Communication is an exchange of information. In relationships, it is the way you convey your wants and needs to other people. Communication can be verbal or non verbal. Our mouth can be saying one thing but our body is saying another.
It either brings people together or tears them apart
Communication either brings people together or tears them apart. For myself, good communication speaks directly to my heart. I love having amazing conversations. I adore having a connection with someone where you can just look at each other and know what the other person is thinking. It is so wonderful when body language matches a persons words.
Convey your wants and needs
Commuication helps you to convey your wants and needs. How you go about it can greatly influence the outcome. When you want to speak to someone about something important make sure you choose the right time. Opening the door for that important conversation while they are working may not be the best timing. Also try not to bring up too many topics all at once otherwise it will be more difficult to find solutions and the other person may feel overwhelmed.
Pick your moment and environment wisely
Be mindful about the environment when you’re communicating. Keeping good eye contact and not staring at your phone lets the other person know that you are interested and the conversation is important. Try to be sitting comfortably and not shifting around too much. Offer time for the other person to respond and truly listen rather than waiting to speak.
If you want to discuss some things that are struggles for you presentation is everything. Are you coming at the topic as a victim or are you coming at it as empowered. The difference is in the wording, tone and body language. If you struggle with depression and the other person has an upbeat personality that you admire you could compliment them on that and then say I’m working on being more upbeat like you are! Now you’ve opened the door to discuss your depression but instead of putting it onto them you create an atmosphere of support through your vulnerability.
Don’t be in victim mode
What if you are communicating in order to get to know someone? For starters, the way we speak about ourselves in those first moments actually tells the other person a lot about ourselves. I remember years ago I used to think that my playful big personality would be misunderstood by other people. I used to enter conversations hiliting that I have a big personality and people either love it or hate it. Right then and there I was shining a huge spotlight on a part of me that I had become insecure about. Not only was this revealing but by accident I could have also been sending the message that the other person could choose to change that about me. I learned later that this part of my personality was something my closest friends really loved about me and I learned not to view it as a downside. Thank goodness nobody ever walked through the door I had opened by telling them about it right out of the gate.
Keep it light
If I smile and joke about things that concern me it will also convey a whole other impression. Right now in our world everyone is getting down about restrictions and worries. If we are chatting and laughing about the crazy going on around us it adds a lighter feel to the conversation and we don’t get sucked in to the downer mode.
All in all the main thing is to be direct when communicating. Let the person know what it is you are seeking so they don’t build a story of their own. Using the right language which is you centered instead of them centered can keep defensiveness down and leave space for you both to hear one another.